The Invisible Condom - Which Ain't

I'm sorry. I know I keep meaning to write about food, but today's Times has an article on a corn recipe that I personally created. So this person gets her name splashed all over the paper as if she had anything to do with it. She roasts corn on the cob, cuts off the kernels, butters them salt and pepper - Pepper's a HUGE mistake, and serves with a sprig of thyme. She obviously couldn't leave the corn that Nature created alone. She just had to mess around with it. One day she'll learn to do corn right, and not steal my recipes.

Mine was printed weeks ago in The Fire Island News. Crooks.

So anyway, this condom article appeared, and I submit it to you verily.

September 6, 2007
Invisible Proof for Invisible Condom

The Federal Court of Australia declared yesterday that Citrofresh International (an organic antibacterial product company) and one of their former employees, Ravi Narain, misled investors about the efficacy of their products. Citrofresh and Narain reportedly made misleading statements to the Australian Stock Exchange, namely, that Citrofresh “offers a global solution to reduce and eventually stop the spread of HIV.” The “solution” in question is a post-coital spray that would “act as an invisible condom,” protecting the user by having a “significant impact on reducing the transmission of HIV and [other] sexually transmitted diseases.”
Narain, former managing editor of the company, faces fines of up to $400,000 for two statements made “without reasonable grounds” in 2005, according to the Australian Securities and Investments Commission.

Some bastards will do anything for a lousy buck. They should toss him in the slammer with a supply of his phoney invisibles, and when he becomes someone's bitch, he can always use the spray for protection. That ought to fix his ass.